Tuesday, April 8, 2008


I loved Conference. It amazes me that I used to dread it. I would fall asleep whenever I watched it and make faces at all the old men on the TV screen. I even gave up the opportunity to go to Pres. Hinckley's birthday party once, how foolish I was. This year I didn't want it to end. Tyson and I watched The Testaments afterwards because it just felt so good to feel the Spirit so strongly, I didn't want it to go away. I enjoyed all the talks, and even with my first time having a baby to take care of I didn't have to miss a single talk. I feel so blessed to have been born into the LDS faith, I never had to search churches to find the truth, I just had to have faith in what I had always been taught. Faith, that is something that used to come so easily for me. Lately it seems as though I fear everything. I am so worried that something will happen to my little baby, or every kiss and hug with Tyson will be the last. I know this life is so frail and we have no guarentees of how long we will live. But my fear was eating me alive. I couldn't sleep, and I was constantly have emotional breakdowns, and I was being so selfish of Tyson's time. So I have been reading the Conference talks from last August, and Elder Hales talked about the need to receive personal revelation, that we need to pray and have faith. I realized then that my faith was slipping away from me because I did not trust in God enough. "If ye have faith, ye shall not fear" (? I'm pretty sure that is a scripture) and "Fear none of these things which thou shalt suffer..." (Rev 2:10). It was amazing to me when I prayed, how much peace I felt. I do not know what will happen in this life, but I must trust in the Lord. It was such a wonderful feeling, listening to Conference and feeling that incredible feeling of peace that no one else can give but the Lord, and it is all because He loves us.

No comments:

Post a Comment