Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Sojourning in the Wilderness

"And thus we see that the commandments of God must be fulfilled. And if it so be that the children of men keep the commandments of God he doth nourish them, and strengthen them, and provide means whereby they can accomplish the thing which he has commanded them; wherefore, he did provide means for us while we did sojourn in the wilderness." -1 Nephi 17:3

Lately, I have been reading in Exodus about Moses and the children of Israel and their journeys through the wilderness. Then last night as Tyson and I were reading in our study, we came across this scripture. Most of the chapter talks about the story I have been reading in Exodus, and I don't think it is a coincidence that I happened to be reading about them both at the same time.

Often I complain about my life. There is so much we don't have compared to "most people." Each month we really scrape by to get enough food and often I wonder how long it has been since I have even eaten fresh fruit or anything even relatively healthy. I wonder why we are here in the little town so far from both our families and why Tyson's job pays so little when he does so much. Sometimes I even find myself wondering how the Lord expects us to get by, much less to really save money and stay out of debt all our lives.

Then I read about the children of Israel and wonder, "why are they complaining, hello, they would have died slaves in Egypt? And didn't you just see water flowing from a rock a few minutes ago? Where is your faith?" Last night, I found myself asking the same thing about Laman and Lemuel, "what is your problem guys? Haven't you seen an angel? Why would you think Jerusalem is so much better than where you are now? Hello, you are going to the promise land, what more could you want?" But that is when it hit me. If someone read my story, they would probably wonder the same thing about me. So what if you have to have miracles happen to get you to be able to pay your bills each month? You are on your way to the promise land, deal with it.

I don't want to complain about my life. I am so rich. This sojourning isn't so bad. I have a nice warm apartment and a husband who loves me. Really I have it better than raw meat and manna. I have a little boy who obviously, from the chub rolls on his thighs, is not lacking in food. I know that Tyson and I are suppose to be here right now, that the Lord needs us here to learn something or to help somehow. I just need to keep following His commandments, and He will keep providing a way for us. It probably won't be the way I want. There probably won't be a raise, I might not publish a story, but maybe the price of milk will be cheaper or I will learn to cook without so much cheese. Maybe Josh won't need so many diapers. :)

It is just nice to know that even though where we are right now may seem like a wilderness to me, there is a promise land not so far away, and this wilderness will let me appreciate that promise land. And maybe right now is the promise land, at least in some ways. I am pretty happy, I have so much to be happy about. I mean, the wilderness is a lot better than slave driven Egypt right?


  1. Finally! A post that portrays you as semi-normal and not this picture perfect person. Sorry I shouldn't be excited about that, but it was REALLY nice to read your post. I read all of your posts but often don't know what to write because you sound so perfect most of the time. But today... Of course you are very close to being perfect and I look up to you a lot, but I can relate 100% and really appreciate you expressing your feelings. I must admit though, I'm quite concerned that you haven't had fresh fruit in a while. Jason and I have been married for over 3 years now and have grocery shopping down to a science. We do not used processed foods (including boxed mac & cheese & ramon noodles, eat very well, and always have treats around, all for just $15 per person in the family per week. If you'd like me to send you some ideas I can. Honestly, I'm working on writing a book, just because it appears there is so much of a need for it. I love meal planning, making grocery lists, grocery shopping, and above all Thanks so much again for your post. I love that scripture!

  2. ummm... amen. and now i know for sure you'll be relief society president in about a year :)

  3. we like this. you are a talented writer, cami! thanks for sharing your profound, positive thoughts. we love you!

  4. Oh, Cam. You have so much faith and a talent for simple happiness. I love your blog, it makes me smile.

  5. My sentiments exactly, thanks for phrasing it so well. We are so happy to be back in touch and love to see pictures of your family.