The only thing that seems to be taking a long time being normal is my eye sight. I still am having a hard time reading and right now, all the words are a bit blurry. I wonder if that was pregnancy eye stuff, or if I really am just getting old. :)
So the in-laws are here, which I am loving, and then my mom got back two days ago from visiting my sister, Kenni. I am sad for Kenni because I wish she had some of our family closer to her (I really wish that family was me too), but I'm glad Mom got to be there, and I'm really glad she is back. I have gotten way too spoiled with her living so close.
Yesterday at church, Tyson was able to bless little Andrew. My Dad even took some time off work so he could be there, which meant a lot to me. I love baby blessings. It gives such insight into who the Lord sees this little one becoming, it gives a glimpse of their potential. It is such a neat thing to see Tyson worry so much about the blessing before hand. That has been one of the neatest things about being married, I get to see the Priesthood at work at a very closer level. I didn't realize so much thought and humility went into all the things he does when he uses the Priesthood authority that he has. It is very inspiring. And I am very excited to see my little Andrew grow up and the man he will be.
I used to think I would be a mom to little kids forever. Somedays it still feels like that, but I am starting to see how quickly that changes. Little Andrew looks a lot like Joshua when he was a baby, so it gives me a lot of flashbacks to almost six years ago. I can still remember so much of it like it was just a few weeks ago, or even this morning. How could six whole years have flown by? Tyson pointed out last night that we have already had Josh for a 1/3 of the time we will have him home with us. WHAT?! I thought. Okay, I know that sounds a little weird, but think about it. Six years has flown by, I only get 12 more until he is all grown up.
Then there is him going to school. Today was his first day of Kindergarten. It only lasted an hour or so, but tomorrow will be a full day. So much of his day will be out of my influence. He will meet people I don't know, hear lots of things I would rather he didn't, experience things that I am not a part of and may never learn about. It pulls at my heart and makes my throat tighten, almost like I am being a little strangled.
Should I really let him do this? Would homeschooling him be better? Should I drive him so he doesn't ride the bus?
But I know that isn't how it should be. I know he needs to learn how to resist temptation and not repeat things that he knows aren't good. I know he can be an incredible influence for good for people that really need it. I know hiding him away and hoping the world doesn't reach him wouldn't be good for any of us. Homeschooling is great for some kids and some families, but I prayed about it a lot, and I know I need to let him go to school. I just hope my influence and teachings will be stronger than anyone else's. And I hope that my influence is actually a good one. :)
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