"Satan! I know him!"

My little Caleb is such a quiet little person (unless he is sick and then the ENTIRE world will know it).  He just works calmly most of the day and when he does speak it is pretty profound.  Sometimes it is goofy or terrifying (his imagination is a little violent), but he always makes us laugh.  And he is so thoughtful.

The other day he was washing his hands and he looks at me and says "Mom, was today hard for you?  Josh was home from school and you watched two other kids besides me and Josh and Andrew and Matthew.  Are you tired?"
It was just so sweet because yes it is hard for me, but I don't mind it.  I really didn't think any of the kids notice since they are usually in their own worlds.  So I picked him up and hugged him tight for caring about me.

Today while I was reading Elder Scott's talk from this past General Conference found here, Caleb came up and snuggled right next to me and asked me to read it out loud.  So I did and every few sentences he would make his own comments, most of the time it had nothing to do with what I was reading.  Then I read "Satan would attempt to exploit" and Caleb says "SATAN!  I know him.  Well, I know about him.  That is what I learned about on that Sunday that you asked me and I couldn't remember."
I am thinking "oh, wow, please, keep going.  And please tell me you didn't learn something that will make your imagination even more terrifying."
He continued, "I learned that Jesus's plan is better than Satan's.  And the people that weren't righteous didn't get bodies and they live with Satan.  Right, Mom?"
"Wow, Caleb, good job.  The people that chose to follow Jesus got to come to Earth and get bodies and we keep trying to be righteous here.  So you learned that at church?"
Caleb: "Yup, my teachers taught me."
me: "Sister Epps?"
Caleb: "Yeah, and the other one."
(Sister Diaz, if you read this, we are trying to get him to actually say your name.  But thank you both for teaching Caleb so well.  It is so wonderful to know he is learning so many gospel truths)

So, don't be surprised if your kids know all kinds of things that you didn't think they would understand.  They are smarter than you think.

Charlie Brown Syndrome

"Hey Josh," pause "Josh" nothing "Joshua" still nothing "JOSHUA!"

Then he casually glances up like "is someone saying something?"

All kids go through the selective listening phase right?  That I understand.  The "I know Mom is trying to get my attention but I really don't want to respond" ignoring me.  Okay, I know how to deal with that, kind of.

But this is a new 'not listening' phase.  It is like he really doesn't hear me.  And the worst is when he is looking at my face while I am talking, he doesn't even understand what I am saying.

"Josh, hey, can you go get your shoes on?"
"What?"
"Go get your shoes on."
"What?"
"YOUR-SHOES-GO-PUT-THEM-ON-YOUR-FEET"
"I don't understand anything you are saying."

Or just today, no joke, this is exactly what happened:

Logan found a car Josh was looking for all morning, so he hands it to Josh.  Josh just takes it and keeps playing.
Me: "Josh....Josh...Joshua...HEY JOSH!"
Josh looks up, finally.
Me: "Hey, Logan just gave you your car, tell him thank you."
He looks confused.
Me: "Logan, you know him?  Tell him THANK YOU"
Josh: "Okay..."
Then he walks right past Logan and back towards the bedrooms.  I am thinking what on earth?  So I follow him and he is trying to pull Andrew out of his crib.
Me: "Josh, what are you doing?"
Josh: "Isn't this what you said to do?"
So my question is, how does "tell Logan thank you" and "go wake up the baby and take him out of his crib" sound ANYTHING alike?

All the older boys are playing by each other.  Josh's dinosaurs are talking REALLY loud.  So Caleb keeps telling Josh "be quieter, I can't think!" but Josh is totally not listening.
Me: "JOSH!  Please be quieter, you are being really loud."
Josh: "Why!!! I don't need to go to the bathroom."
Me: "I didn't say anything about going to the bathroom, I said to be quiet."
Josh mutters: "I don't understand anything she is saying."

So, I have come to the conclusion that I am the adult in Charlie Brown's life.  All Josh hears is "WA-WA-WA"  Is this normal?  Cuz, I am not sure how much more I can take.  Maybe I need to try the whisper approach, or act like I don't understand him.  There has got to be a better way than this Charlie Brown lifestyle, although it is pretty funny after the moments are over, especially picturing everything that comes out of my mouth as deep, wordless noise.